ok ... here is a skit.
this skit is totally unrehearsed [as will soon become abundantly obvious].
introducing the cast of characters:
THREE COUSINS FROM TOTALLY UNRELATED FAMILIES
~Domer Quiggly
~Anna Grammatica
~Bizmo Frump
setting:
the chums Vespa motor scooter has just sputtered to a stop
on one of the outer rings of Jupiter.
Bizmo: Our Vespa motor scooter...
Anna: just sputtered to a stop...
Domer: on one of the outer rings of Jupiter.
Bizmo: How was that?
Producer: Well, actually that was hideous.
Domer: Is that good?
Producer: No, that is not good.
Anna: What did we do wrong?
Producer: Only two things ... everything you said & everything you did.
I think I could get three dehydrated house plants in here & they would do
a better job than you clowns.
Domer: So it was funny?
Producer: In a sick sort of way, yes.
Look kids, I know you gave it all you had...but the 3 of you combined
don't have the mental wattage of a hair band, ok? See, I depend on the
casting people to send me talented, driven, capable young actors ...
do they do this? No. They send me three vegetables on a Vespa. so ...
what do you expect me to do?
Anna: Have us for lunch with a nice linguine and clam sauce?
Producer: It had crossed my mind ... let's try the script ONE MORE TIME...
remember, you only read the portions of the script beside the name of your character ... no page numbers, no table of contents; none of that ...
ok?
Anna/Domer/Bizmo: Fer shur.
Producer: Ok ... impress me.
Anna: Oh, Captain Admirable ... we ...we ...we've RUN OUT OF GAS!!!
Domer: There, now, Princess Schizo...don't cry...you'll crack your makeup. Hey, I have an idea! While we stand around in our spiffy outfits
pretending to think of a way out of this predicament, we can idly pass the time by playing with Flyback, our adorable alien companion.
Anna: Oh, Captain ... what a stunning idea! Can i have the first shot?
Bizmo: GRMMP!!!
Domer: Why, of course, Princess...here, use my handy pocket
hot/cold/massage & vaporize combination home gym and rocket launcher.
Anna: Oh, my ... it's still warm!
Producer: Stick to the script, lady!
Domer: Here, let's change the setting from "Crispy" to "Extra Agony".
Bizmo: ZSHNDNKDT!!
Domer: Go ahead ... i've pinned him underneath the Vespa.
Effects Man: BBBB-ZZZZZZPPPTTT-POP-SPROW-BEZZAPP-FOOSH
Domer: Well, dang, maam ... I knew there was something wrong with
the detent on that selector switch.
Anna: Oh, Captain Admirable...I can't bear to look at what I've done!!!
Domer: Yeah, I know whatcha mean ... the Producer all melted and
charred like that ... kinda looks like a piece of barbequed chicken,
doesn't he?
Anna: *gag*
Bizmo: Did we get the job?
Effects Man: Well, no ... but if you take the producer's car you may
be able to get out of the country ... I don't think he wants it anymore.
Bizmo: I wonder what those ribs are like?
Domer: Gads, Bizmo, get away from him ... put that fork down!
Anna: Guys, I'll be in the car ... anybody got any tunez for the ride?
Bizmo: I got some Beach Boys 8 tracks.
Anna: Shoot him, Domer. Shoot him now.
All names changed to protect the reprehensible.
this skit is totally unrehearsed [as will soon become abundantly obvious].
introducing the cast of characters:
THREE COUSINS FROM TOTALLY UNRELATED FAMILIES
~Domer Quiggly
~Anna Grammatica
~Bizmo Frump
setting:
the chums Vespa motor scooter has just sputtered to a stop
on one of the outer rings of Jupiter.
Bizmo: Our Vespa motor scooter...
Anna: just sputtered to a stop...
Domer: on one of the outer rings of Jupiter.
Bizmo: How was that?
Producer: Well, actually that was hideous.
Domer: Is that good?
Producer: No, that is not good.
Anna: What did we do wrong?
Producer: Only two things ... everything you said & everything you did.
I think I could get three dehydrated house plants in here & they would do
a better job than you clowns.
Domer: So it was funny?
Producer: In a sick sort of way, yes.
Look kids, I know you gave it all you had...but the 3 of you combined
don't have the mental wattage of a hair band, ok? See, I depend on the
casting people to send me talented, driven, capable young actors ...
do they do this? No. They send me three vegetables on a Vespa. so ...
what do you expect me to do?
Anna: Have us for lunch with a nice linguine and clam sauce?
Producer: It had crossed my mind ... let's try the script ONE MORE TIME...
remember, you only read the portions of the script beside the name of your character ... no page numbers, no table of contents; none of that ...
ok?
Anna/Domer/Bizmo: Fer shur.
Producer: Ok ... impress me.
Anna: Oh, Captain Admirable ... we ...we ...we've RUN OUT OF GAS!!!
Domer: There, now, Princess Schizo...don't cry...you'll crack your makeup. Hey, I have an idea! While we stand around in our spiffy outfits
pretending to think of a way out of this predicament, we can idly pass the time by playing with Flyback, our adorable alien companion.
Anna: Oh, Captain ... what a stunning idea! Can i have the first shot?
Bizmo: GRMMP!!!
Domer: Why, of course, Princess...here, use my handy pocket
hot/cold/massage & vaporize combination home gym and rocket launcher.
Anna: Oh, my ... it's still warm!
Producer: Stick to the script, lady!
Domer: Here, let's change the setting from "Crispy" to "Extra Agony".
Bizmo: ZSHNDNKDT!!
Domer: Go ahead ... i've pinned him underneath the Vespa.
Effects Man: BBBB-ZZZZZZPPPTTT-POP-SPROW-BEZZAPP-FOOSH
Domer: Well, dang, maam ... I knew there was something wrong with
the detent on that selector switch.
Anna: Oh, Captain Admirable...I can't bear to look at what I've done!!!
Domer: Yeah, I know whatcha mean ... the Producer all melted and
charred like that ... kinda looks like a piece of barbequed chicken,
doesn't he?
Anna: *gag*
Bizmo: Did we get the job?
Effects Man: Well, no ... but if you take the producer's car you may
be able to get out of the country ... I don't think he wants it anymore.
Bizmo: I wonder what those ribs are like?
Domer: Gads, Bizmo, get away from him ... put that fork down!
Anna: Guys, I'll be in the car ... anybody got any tunez for the ride?
Bizmo: I got some Beach Boys 8 tracks.
Anna: Shoot him, Domer. Shoot him now.
All names changed to protect the reprehensible.
Anime-Illiterate Lemon-Eating DDR-challenged Swamp Monkey
